Ryan Hall's Journal

November 6, 2008 Entry (Posted November 17, 2008)

Living with everything I need, not everything I want

Another ING New York City Marathon gone by and another year of watching on the sidelines. The ING New York City Marathon has to be one of the hardest marathons to watch. I could feel Gomes dos Santos’s final strides through Central Park like they were my own. I am hoping that in the not-too-distant future they will in fact be my own. But I guess I shouldn't be too impatient—after all, I have only been a bona fide marathoner for just a year and a half now.

It's hard for me to imagine that just two years ago I was coming out to get a taste of what a major marathon is all about. I can hardly believe that since then I have run in four marathons: London ’07, ’08, the Olympic Trials ’07 and the Olympic Games ’08. It was here two years ago that I got hooked on the marathon. I will never forget riding on the lead vehicle alongside of the elite men thinking to myself that one day I would be out there.

As much as I would have loved to run this year’s ING New York City Marathon I am in no shape to do it. My heart is willing but my flesh is weak. I did a four-mile tempo run before leaving for New York, the first tempo run since Beijing, and it went well, meaning that I was only 20 seconds per mile slower than marathon pace. I am constantly amazed by how the body is able to progress in just a few months of training. I fully expect three months from now to be able to run 15 miles at marathon pace. To do it all it takes is the proper formula of stress, rest, and adaptation.

I suppose I should excuse myself for not being in top form at the moment. From Beijing I have traveled to Germany, Belgium, France, Italy, back to Germany again, back to Italy, New York City, Chicago, and finally home to Big Bear Lake again completing my trip around the globe. Yet being home was short lived (meaning two days long) before leaving for Aspen, CO, back to Big Bear shortly and then on to Chicago for the marathon and then straight on to Zambia. When we finally got back from Zambia we returned for 24 hours to get our place ready to rent out for the winter ski crowd before making the five-hour drive to Mammoth, where we will base ourselves until the spring. It felt great to be back in Mammoth. I soaked up all three days of it before heading out to the Big Apple for the marathon.

Being on the road is the glamorous part of the job. Over the last couple months I have seen the Coliseum in Rome, the Great Wall of China, and Victoria Falls in Zambia. How many people can say that? But this is only the professional runner lifestyle for a few months of the year. The remainder of the year will be spent doing what I love most about being a professional runner: simple living with very limited travel and a whole lot of really hard training and sleep.
 
As crazy as the summer and fall have been it has been exactly what the doctor ordered. After the Olympics I was fighting a bit of a post-Olympic letdown. I had invested so much into that one race and I wanted so badly to make everyone proud, to honor all that they had invested in me. I felt like August 24 was my moment to shine, and it was. Yet from day one of my training it was like I was butting my head against a wall. The very first day back after taking a break from London I was trying to work on some flexibility doing some squats with no weight, yet the next day I had to hobble through a run as my patella tendons on both legs were badly inflamed. It was a problem that plagued me for my entire Olympic buildup and even in the race itself. Even though things weren't going super-great I still poured myself into my training. I remember doing a hard 26 miler in the heat of the day up in Mammoth thinking that I have never ran harder than that effort. I really poured myself into my workouts, yet they never improved to the level I had previously been able to get to. Maybe this was precisely my problem—that I was trying too hard. There is something interesting about paradoxes in life. Whether it is in the yin and yang of the East, or that one must lose one’s life to gain it in Christianity, there are paradoxes everywhere and running is no exception. When I go into workouts trying to hit a homerun I rarely do, yet when I don't swing for the fences I usually end up trotting around the bases.

From the moment I ran through the tunnel into the Olympic stadium I knew that the Olympics wasn’t everything I wanted but it was everything I needed. Meaning that I had dreamt of winning for so long but by losing I would develop a whole lot of character and my running career would have a lot different direction compared to if I had won. I could see it being somewhat difficult to stay motivated after accomplishing something as big as winning a gold medal. I am not sure but I would think there have been plenty of athletes whose careers took a turn for the worse after winning it all. Maybe that is why so many movie stars who are at the very top of their industry hit rock bottom succumbing to drug addictions. However, this reality (that placing 10th was perhaps just what the doctor ordered) didn’t keep me from being disappointed at the time. But I couldn’t shake the feeling that if the Olympics had gone how I wanted them to it would have been bad for me in the long run and even in my day to day life. There is something very healthy about not having everything we want, which is maybe why parents try hard not to spoil their kids. I think that a lot of joy can come from not getting everything we want. Let me explain.

After the Olympics what I needed to get "back on the horse" was not hard training or time at home thinking, what I needed was inspiration. I needed inspiration that I could hear, touch, and see. So on my birthday, October 14, I unwrapped a most timely present: a trip to Zambia to go and see for myself the faces that Sara and I had been working alongside Team World Vision to bring clean water to.

I must admit that going to Zambia I had a lot of preconceived notions of what the people and the country would be like. I knew it was one of the poorest countries in the world so I expected to see a lot of heartache and devastation. I couldn’t have been more wrong.

Describing my trip to Zambia can easily be summed up with two words: community and joy. On weekends like the ING New York City Marathon I am reminded that we do have events that bring the nation and even whole world together, when everyone is united to conquer something bigger than they could do on their own, which is exactly what the people in Zambia do on a daily basis, only their giant is not 26.2 miles of pavement, rather it is shelter, food, disease, and most urgently, clean water. I recently read that over 20,000 people die everyday from problems rooted in unclean water (The Irresistible Revolution, Shane Claiborne). This statistic blows my mind. So in an effort to start combating the problem this year Sara and I got involved with Team World Vision which dedicated funds raised through the Chicago Marathon and races all over the world to bring clean water to some villages in Zambia filled with people who desperately need it.

After our first run in Zambia I was convinced that the trip was already worth it. Children ran alongside of us laughing and smiling for miles and miles as we ran along the main road going through town. The people were contagiously joyful. I could not help but to have my spirits return from the post-Olympic letdown. I will never forget the looks in the kids’ faces. I see them now when I am doing abs or zoning in on a hard run and I feel their joy in my steps. It is important for me to know that I am not just running for me but there are people all over the world who are urging me on. I may be helping in some small way to bring them clean water but they are helping me to run with joy, purpose and passion.

The other image from Africa that is burned into my head is being on the starting line of a 15K road race that this small village put on for us as a way of showing their appreciation for all our efforts and seeing 150 pairs of feet ranging from barefoot, to flip-flops to knee-high plastic farming boots. I ran the entire race in 90 degree temperatures on black pavement straight up hill next to two guys: one that had a pair of flip flops on and the other was running barefoot. I realized then that I have no idea what it means to be tough. What was really cool was seeing the boreholes that had already been dug in the community along our running route. We were way out in the sticks yet kids could fill their buckets from the clean water from the boreholes whenever they needed. While I was there I learned that a community with clean water increases the life expectancy of its members from 34 to 56. The 12 years of extra life means that more children can grow up with their parents still around. Water is so essential to us as elite runners that if we miss one of eight bottles along the course filled with just 8 oz of fluid it could mean the difference between victory and defeat (This may have well been the case for Goumri this year in New York), so it is neat to give something that is so essential for us to something that is so much more essential for them. I will never look at water the same way.

Africa opened up my eyes to a lot of things. I strongly recommend that anyone who gets a chance to go there does, but most of all it showed me what it looks like to not have everything you want but to have everything you need. They had each other and they had joy and that seemed to suffice for them even if all that was served was one meal of shima and beans and some clean water. I have been inspired to look at my own life and decide what things I really need and have realized that this is enough for me.

I remember when I was young not having some things that I really wanted but I always had everything I needed. It made me really appreciate the things I did have. For example, I never traveled much until I started running. I remember the first time I got to fly I was mesmerized and even later in college I still soaked up every minute of the trips. Now that I have traveled so much my senses have become dull to the miracle of our modern-day travel and I have to really be mindful to appreciate traveling as much as I once did. This is why I recommend that everyone go to a poor area so that they can once again realize how blessed they are. I have to step back from my Olympic experience and think, sure I am disappointed to not have my best stuff on that day, but I should be overwhelmingly thankful that I was privileged enough to be there. Sometimes life’s events aren’t everything we dreamt of, but I think if we step back, maybe look at life through someone else’s eyes, we will probably realize that although the shattered dream wasn’t everything we hoped for just maybe it was everything we needed.

June 26, 2008 entry (Posted July 7, 2008)

This past week my parents have been cleaning out their garage. It has been packed with stuff ever since their house flooded the weekend that I set the American Record at the Amarco Houston Half-Marathon [January 2007]. It is a long story but the short version is that Chad, my little brother, came home from a day at school and noticed water running under the door as he approached. When he opened the door he was confronted with six inches of fresh water on the ground of my parents first floor. It turns out there was just a tiny split in a pipe in the attic of the house. My parents spent the next year doing a complete remodel of the interior. It is a good thing I had a good race in Houston to somewhat make-up for the inconvenience.

In the process of cleaning out the garage my Mom came across a box with some of my old junk in it. I dug through it to see if there was anything that was worth hanging onto and I came across one of my old training logs. It didn't take long for me to recall the summer of 2002. I had just completed my freshmen year at Stanford. I was coming off a sub-par cross country season, in which I was responsible for my team losing the NCAA title to Colorado by one point, a red-shirt injured indoor season, and a terrible track season in which I ran four seconds slower than my high school personal best for 1500 and series of terrible 800-meter races that I was finishing last in. To top off the season I had failed to hit a qualifying time for NCAAs so my season was pretty much over by mid-May. To say I was disappointed is a huge under-statement. This was not the successful freshmen year I envisioned for myself heading into college. So the summer of 2002 was my chance to redeem myself.

I have never trained harder than I trained during the summer of 2002. Not before I ran 2:06:17 in London, not before I broke an hour for the half-marathon, never. I can still remember putting in session after session of intense training. Here is an example of one of my weeks of training toward the end of the summer. Remember that this training was all done at approximately 7,000 ft.

Mon: AM: 14 by 200M hill sprints/bounding, 3 by slightly downhill and fast 800M (11 miles). PM: 9 by 400M in 60 or better with circuit training (squat, standing jumps, toe raises, stair hops). I did one of the exercises in between each 400, keeping the recovery active and short (7 miles).

Tues: AM: sprints: 10 by 40M, 10 by 80M. Jog to ski resort and run up twice (9 miles). PM: Training run at 6:10 pace (6 miles).

Wed: AM: 2 by three mile repeats at sub 5 minute mile pace (11 miles). PM: 30 minute Z pattern running on a football field (sprinting the diagonals), then a 10 mile uphill run at medium effort (18 miles).

Thur: AM: Sprints (10 by 40M and 10 by 80M) and jog to ski resort and run up twice (9 miles). PM: Jog to ski resort and run up twice (8 miles).

Fri: AM: 8 mile training run. PM: 6 mile tempo run (10 miles).

Sat: AM: ran 16 miles hilly long run.

Sun: AM: 7 easy miles

Total Miles: 120

I vividly remember the intense training I was logging. The actual running was only the half of it. I was doing an hour a day of yoga five days a week, swimming in the lake for 15 minutes most days, and doing a weight program. I was pretty much training all day long. I remember at the end of the summer I felt very strong, but I also lacked pop in my legs. While my workouts were going well I didn't report back to pre-season camp with any freshness in my legs. That was a big mistake. I started off the season well, winning my first two meets but then it was all down hill after September ended. By the time NCAA' rolled around I was hanging on for dear life. I remember finishing the race and seeing my dad afterward commenting that "I never wanted to run a 10K again." It was a disappointing end to the hardest work I had ever done.
The following summer I learned my lesson. I came home, took a good break, got a job at the local theater, and did exactly what coach prescribed. What resulted was my best collegiate cross country season, finishing second as an individual and defending our title in a big way, with only 24 points. It was a season I will never forget, partially because of the success but partially because I learned a big lesson between the difference in training hard and training hard and smart.

Now, as a marathoner, when I look back at the summer of 2002, I am surprised that I am taken a back by how hard I trained. I always thought to be a marathoner you had to run 170 miles a week. But now I see it differently. I realize that, for me-at this point in my career, if I am doing 170 miles a week, I won't have enough life in my legs to run the intervals, tempo runs, and long runs fast enough to prepare to run with the best marathoners in the world. I know that in order for me to be able to do 15-mile tempo runs at sub five minute pace at altitude I need a certain amount of freshness in my legs.

Unfortunately, training "smart" is not always cut and dry. As athletes, we are always striving to get to "the next level," and to get there it takes hard work, maybe harder work than we have ever done before. So how hard is too hard? For me I have found a few keys that let me know if I am pushing too hard in practice. I feel like it is ok to be tired on certain days, but I should feel that my legs are "responding" well to the training. For example, I always am looking for a little bit of freshness in my legs. I can pretty well tell how my legs are feeling by doing 200s or any type of strides. If I feel a little spring in my step than I know that my legs are absorbing the training well. I can also tell how my legs are doing on my easy runs. I take my easy runs really easy. I always just pay attention to how my legs are feeling and essentially let them dictate the pace. So if I am moving along effortlessly on an easy run than I know my legs are feeling pretty good and ready for another hard session. Perhaps the biggest indicator is seeing improvement in my workout times over substantial periods of time. This doesn't mean that if I repeat a workout I did two weeks earlier and run slower that I am over trained but if I repeat the workout multiple times without seeing any progress or at least feeling better than maybe I need to take it easy for a couple of days.

Each athlete has to find what works for them. I know that what works for me may not work for everyone. However, I believe it is very important for the athlete to be "in touch" with their own body and know how they are responding to the training. It is a skill that takes time to develop, or at least it did for me. But through experimentation and even doing some crazy training every once in a while we find our lines between what is hard and what is smart and hard.

April 28, 2008 entry (Posted April 28, 2008)

My Life As a Pretender

For the last two weeks during my break from training, my job has changed from running to "pretending.” I say pretending because acting didn't work out for me. After running in the Olympic Trials, I had a photo shoot with Outside magazine and the guy was trying to get a real intense look out of me, but all I could do was laugh and smile. I am pretty sure I lost the cover as a result. It was then that I realized my career as an actor/model was never going to happen. All I could do was smile. I only had one "look."

Naturally, I was pretty nervous on the trip back from the Boston Marathon knowing that a week of photoshoots awaited, all of which would be requesting different poses and facial expressions that I would most likely not be able to manufacture. First up were commercials that Sara and I would be shooting for Team World Vision. It was during this shoot that I received the advice that would change my ability to "act" forever. Michael (the head guy for Team World Vision) suggested I don’t see it as acting but rather "pretending." He was joking, but the funny thing was that his advice actually helped me to breakthrough my acting barrier. The next day I had a photo shoot with Asics where I would need to bring my "A" game. I got pretty nervous when I walked in and met 15 people whose sole purpose was to make sure that the pictures of me looked good. For the first shot I had to put on baby oil and water to re-enact the finish of a race. Later on I had to hold an American flag with fans blowing on me. It was all pretty comical for me, but I realized that it is all part of the job, and my "pretending" mindset helped me get through it.

One thought that helped me pretend was picturing myself on the starting line of the Olympic marathon. When I see myself there I have no problem getting an "intense" look on my face. So now I have two "looks," smiley Ryan and intense Ryan. Who knows maybe one day I will follow in Zoolanders footsteps and come out with a whole new look that will shock the world in Beijing!

I am now at the end of my two-week recovery period, so fortunately I can start doing what I do best, train rather than act. A lot of people ask me about how much time off I take after a marathon and what I do. This time around it has been a little different than my first two marathons. Usually I finish the race and don't run another step or do any type of running for two weeks. However, with the Olympics just four months away, we planned to do a good job recovering. After the race ended I took a few minutes to collapse on the ground and get some fluids and recovery shakes in my body then I hobbled through a very slow cool down. After coming home, during my first week off I got massages almost daily followed by ice baths and went to the pool to swim and kick in effort to flush my legs out. The second week off I began to do some light jogging and strides to get my range of motion back. I don't particularly enjoy time off but I am learning to embrace it as part of the program to keep improving. I am usually antsy to run again after a week or so.

Today, I am glad to be able to return to running and start to focus on training for my first Olympic Games. It is truly starting to set in now that I am really going to the Olympics. It is surreal to get up in the morning and know that I am heading out on a run to prepare myself for the Olympics. I am blessed to be living my dream. It has been a long hard road, with lots of emotional highs and lows, but, with the help of God, my wife, my family, coaches, and teammates I am almost there.

If you are interested in a preview of the weekend photos check out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0JVbkKGHyUg or if you want to learn more about Team World Vision check out www.worldvision.org/team.

March 3, 2008 entry (Posted March 5, 2008)

To be completely honest, I was bummed after XC Nationals. I was in good shape and ready to go, or so I thought. My expectations were high and I was hoping to kick off 2008 with a bang, so I was naturally a little bent when things didn't turn out how I had hoped. Finishing fifth wasn't a terrible performance and my hat goes off to Dathan and the rest of the guys on the team (I am sure we will all be proud of how they represent the US at Worlds), but it just wasn't building the momentum I was looking for heading into London. Afterwards, there were lots of reasons, which I constantly kept reminding myself of, for why I didn't perform well, but that didn't keep me from getting a little bummed. Although, I welcome these humbling experiences because they get me fired up. Before all my best races I had humbling experiences that preceded them.

Often times my worst races come at the times when I feel the most prepared and am anticipating floating through a spectacular performance with ease. It is weird how that works and I don't quite understand it. The only explanation I can think of is that whenever I expect something to be easy it always turns out to be far harder than I am prepared to run, but when I am preparing myself for a war, then any part of the race that feels easy is a bonus. The problem is that heading into XC Nationals I was expecting a war and still came up short. I honestly didn't feel like I was proud going into the race, I just felt like I couldn't run any faster. But I guess I can live with that and use the humbling experience to prepare my spirit for London.

I was recently reading a book about Lance Armstrong and his preparations for the 2004 Tour de France. It really helped me change my perspective towards bumps along the road when getting ready for the big dance. For example, in looking at Lance’s buildup of races for the 2004 Tour he only won one of his races and most of the time finished considerably behind, sometimes even behind the same guys who would be his biggest rivals in the Tour. Before one such race a reporter asked him what his goals were for the race and he smiled and replied, "to not get last." This was a good reminder to me that even a guy that seems as invincible as Lance Armstrong is not always sharp. After XC Nationals I was convinced that I should never race leading up to a major marathon (as I did before the Olympic Trials) but I am beginning to shift my perspective to think about these buildup races as opportunities to test out where I am at and practice competing rather than proving to myself or anyone else that I am going to be ready for the big show.

Another thing I picked up from the book was how Lance’s buildup for the Tour was very technically engineered so that he wouldn't peak too early but at a specific point in the Tour. It mentioned guys who would be looking very good early and be beating Lance pretty good, maybe just a month before the tour, but then by the time the tour rolled around Lance killed them. They describe peaking like being on a razors edge. Everything from the proper training to being at the proper weight all had to come together right at the perfect time to be ready to go for the Tour. I think I need to consider this more before major marathons. It is all about timing.

Speaking of timing, one reason why I am so excited about preparing for and racing London is to further perfect the timing that the marathon demands. I felt that going into London last year I had been training too hard for too long and I felt that going into the Trials I didn't have enough time because of the break I had to take less than three months before the Trials. I think we may have figured it out perfectly in this buildup for London. But we will find out for sure in six weeks! I can't wait to get out there and pour myself out...I am preparing for war!

February 6, 2008 entry (Posted February 7, 2008)

I grew up in Big Bear, which I always thought had some pretty gnarly winters, but Mammoth has given me my first real winter. I have never seen so much snow in all my life. Day after day it continues to dump fresh powder. Every morning I open my door to a new three-foot drift of snow that I have to shovel through so Kai can go out for her morning business. It has been weeks since I have been able to look out my kitchen window and I have added shoveling to my daily workout routine. I thank God for my pellet stove that runs like a champ all day long.

Despite the conditions, training has been going very well and we have been able to do every workout when scheduled. I am used to the 30-minute commute down to Round Valley, our home away from home that has become our winter training site. The build-up for London has gotten off to a far better start than my preparations for the Olympic Trials. I am very excited for what awaits at London.

US Cross Country Nationals is less than two weeks away now and my anticipation is great. It has been a while since I last raced and I feel anxious to get out there again and compete. I was thinking the other day about how seldom I have raced this past year. I have lived vicariously through Sara as she raced the past three weeks in a row. I must say that I do miss the highs that come with getting up for a race but I do prefer the boxer style bout with its three month approach. I like to fix my mind on something and then go after it.

The hardest part of the last month has been bacheloring it for the better part of the last month. I always hate the time apart. It is really the only part of the job that I could do without. I had a very memorable scary night home a couple of weeks ago. I, uncharacteristically, rented a scary movie about a mass murder, Ed Geene, because I knew one of the actors in the film. So after driving back from the movie store I came back to my doublewide to find the front door locked, which was kind of freaky since I never lock the front door. Obviously someone had been inside. Being the ambivalent male that I am I didn't think a lot about it and unlocked the door and made dinner while I started the movie.  

Just about the time the movie was starting to freak me out Sara called and we started to chat. She was concerned about the whole locked door thing but I didn't really understand why until she nervously told me that maybe someone is in the house. I guess that would be the only way for someone without a key to lock the front door. Right after she said that I started tripping out. I immediately went to the kitchen and grabbed the biggest butcher knife we had. I opened every closet door and looked under every bed expecting every time that some hairy dude was going to pop out and kill me. I don't think the butcher knife would have done me any good. Anyways, it was probably the scariest moment of my life. Pretty pathetic I know, but for me it gave me a good scare. The adrenaline rush I got was amazing. If some scary people pop out at me on the course at XC Nationals I will be flying.

November 24, 2007 entry (Posted November 26, 2007)

[Ryan Hall Video on Chasing Glory] [NYRR Pro Racing]

As of today, it has been three weeks since the Olympic Marathon Trials. Sara and I finally returned home yesterday after a long three weeks of traveling. A couple days after the Trials we headed to Israel for what would be our first real vacation since our honeymoon two years ago. It was amazing to see the places were Jesus lived, to meet the people of Jesus's descent, to be baptized in the water He was baptized in, and to take a boat ride on the water that He walked on. It was both a time of celebration and relaxation, as we floated effortlessly in the Dead Sea, and a time of spiritual enrichment, as we came to understand more about the context in which Jesus lived. As great as it was to travel and go to the Big Apple I can honestly say that I am excited to be home.

This morning I did my first run faster than a jog as I jumped in part of a “progression” run with Deena. Let me explain that a “progression” run with Deena is no jog in the park, rather it plays out more like a tempo run (Mike you know what I am talking about). But it is always good to run with Deena, as I always take something away from the experience. As we were running I was telling her what a humbling experience it can be to run a marathon regardless of the outcome.

Doing well makes me realize that God has given me a gift and even though I put in a lot work to develop the gift, it is still a gift, and not something that I have earned. I am also humbled by the fact that so many people have invested so much in me to help me do what I do. If it weren’t for my wife coming home early from Europe to be with me during my preparations for the Trials I think things would have turned out a lot differently or if Sara and I would not have stumbled into this perfect training group, place to train, and coach, we certainly would never have developed to this level. It is humbling to know that my success has always been a result of both God-given, undeserved talent and the investments made by the people that surround me.

I could write a book about my experiences leading up to, during, and after the Trials. It was the most emotional weekend of my life. Going from the wonderful high of accomplishing a life long goal to the shocking news of losing a former teammate and friend. I am deeply grieved at the loss of Ryan. I hope to do something special in his memory at the Olympics. He was one of the hardest workers I have ever met. I hope that I can take this characteristic that he embodied and make it a part of me. It still shocks me to think that the day before the race we were doing our last easy run before the race together as if we were going to live forever. There was so much hype leading up to the Trials that I was glad to have the day finally arrive. I was pretty nervous, actually really nervous. I wasn’t nervous that my training hadn’t gone well, or about any nagging injury, I was mostly nervous that I would do something stupid out there, like make too hard of a move too early, and screw up my chances of making my first Olympic team. My wife and coach did a good job of keeping my head on straight as sometimes, in my opinion, the most challenging days (mentally) are the last couple days before the race. The night before the race Sara made me some pasta we brought from home as I watched The Passion of the Christ on my laptop in our hotel room. Despite my nervousness I knew that I was well prepared for whatever the next day would bring.

The race went out slow, as we had expected, but I was surprised when a group of five of us broke away from the field at a very early stage in the race without running particularly hard. I was glad to be in a more manageable group. I remember looking at our group of five and wondering who would be the first to drop off and who would make the first move. I really wanted to be patient and wasn’t planning on being the first to strike. With two laps to go it felt like we didn’t have that much time left to run, while in actuality we still had a good 50 minutes remaining. I looked up at the jumbo-tron and was surprised to see Khalid catching our group. I had no idea he was within striking distance and when I learned of his pursuit I decided that we should do our best to pick up the pace and not let such a great runner into striking distance. I was surprised when the others started to hesitate to follow my move and made the decision at this point that I could maintain my effort all the way to the finish. I was also surprised to see some of my splits, being much faster than I anticipated. I knew that this was my chance at not only making the team but also winning the Trials. This was the opportunity I had been dreaming about for so long and now was the time to take my swing. Upon increasing the tempo I actually felt much more fluid and relaxed. All the hill work and marathon simulations at 8000 ft were making the hills of Central Park seem flat.

I had time to do a lot of thinking out there over the last nine miles. I thought about all the long runs I had done in Mammoth; I pictured myself on Green Church Road; in my mind’s eye I saw Sara biking next to me yelling out encouragement; I thought about my favorite bible verse; I thought about the rock that Deena gave me the night before with the word “believe” etched in it, but most of time I just praised God without really thinking much about anything. I just did what God created me to do for Him.

Now, when I watch the final mile of the race part of me gets embarrassed at my enthusiasm as it is very uncharacteristic of my nature, but part of me remembers what I was feeling when I was out there. After years of struggle I was realizing my dream. It was overcoming all the hard times that made that moment so sweet and sharing it with my friends, family; and teammates made it even sweeter. I will never forget running through Central Park that fall morning, running through my sanctuary.

Summer 2007 entry (Posted August 16, 2007)

As I sit here in the library in Mammoth Lakes reflecting on my European summer I am struck by how different of an experience it was compared to years past. Instead of focusing on racing my summer was spent traveling to various races with Sara and starting my buildup toward the US Olympic Marathon Trials this November. While we stayed in the same city in Belgium (Lueven) it felt very different this year. The weather was not nearly as hot as last year had been and our group was joined by a host of fellow US Track and Field athletes. It was always fun to go down to the track and run into a variety of elite US runners.

The highlight of the summer was getting to travel to Madrid with Sara. While the race didn't go as planned, Sara was tripped up in her 1500-meter race; we still managed to enjoy the city. I had never seen such a vibrant night life. We went out after the race in search of a club and hot chocolate and churros (a Spanish tradition) and the streets were packed with not only youth but also senior citizens in search of a night of fun out on the town. The next day we had the opportunity to go to a Bull fight, which was quite an experience. I had no idea bull fighting was such an art and that they killed so many bulls. Sara and I found ourselves secretly routing for the bulls but unfortunately none prevailed.

The second annual Leuven 800 turned out to be the most widely anticipated and viewed race of the summer. With my coach Terrence, Deena's husband Andrew, Mark from Flocast, and our agent Brad Yewer facing off over the two lap tango (as Andrew Carlson put it). The race didn't disappoint as Terrence and Andrew battled down the homestretch with Andrew prevailing by the slightest of margins. I also had my first try at commentating as Andrew Carlson and I gave the play by play. I think Andrew might have a future with ESPN, as for me, I better keep running.

The hardest part of the summer was leaving my wife Sara as I headed to Mammoth to buckle down on my preparations for the marathon trials. We will be apart for nearly six weeks being the longest we have been apart since we have been married. While it is tough to be here without her I still feel strongly supported by her and the sacrifice we have made adds to my mounting drive to train harder than ever before and show up in New York City ready to run the race of my life. I have dreamed of making an Olympic team and winning a gold medal for well over a decade now and now, after years of ups and downs, I have finally arrived at this stage in my career with an incredible opportunity to take a swing at my goals.

March 12 , 2007 (Posted March 16, 2007)

I am sitting on the second of three flights from Florida (where I ran the Gate River 15k) to Reno, sorting through the weekend's events. It’s not like the race was a complete disaster, I still finished second to my training partner Meb, but the race was far below my expectations and what I was looking for as a momentum-builder for London. Coming off an American record in Houston that felt effortless, I was expecting to have the same speed and stamina that I had there. I knew by the end of the first mile that I was going to have to work a lot harder than at Houston. Once I was off American-record pace, I basically lost all my excitement and was trying to focus on winning the race, but physically and mentally I was just not "on. ” Afterwards I was greatly disappointed, but within the last 24 hours, I've gained new perspective on the race and know it will be key in my preparation for London. For one thing, I needed a good humbling experience so I wouldn't go into London over-confident, expecting the race to feel easy and vulnerable to going out too fast. I also learned that no matter how fit I am, I should go into races excited for a variety of possible outcomes. I need to learn to be just as excited about winning or placing in the top 5 as I am to run fast times and see my full potential realized. This will be the key for London. Before this weekend I would have only been excited in London if I was running with the lead pack or with a closely-pursuing Stefano Baldini. Now, my expectation in terms of what is possible has not changed, but what I will be excited about has. I know I must be excited to be running my best in whatever pack that may be, and finishing without regrets. Hopefully the Gate River Run will serve as a learning experience that I will look back on with fonder memories than I do at the present.

Best of the Week: Landing a 15' native rainbow trout while fly-fishing at Hot Creek in Mammoth. Ian and I went out for a short session on Tuesday. I have never caught a big trout on a fly rod so I was pumped when I landed this beauty.

Worst of the Week: On our flight to Jacksonville, Sara and I were sitting in an exit row and the flight attendant was giving us the typical rundown on what it meant to sit in an exit row. When she was finished she looked at me and asked if I was over 15 years of age. I couldn't believe it! I know I look young for 24, but 15? Looks like I am going to have to grow out the beard again.

December 12, 2006
Reflection of the IAAF World Road Running Championships 2006
(Posted December 20, 2006)

My trip to Debrecen, Hungary was my shortest international trip, yet my most successful international experience. I traveled about 15 hours to Hungary just two days before the competition. I didn't know how my body would react to all the travel. In my past experience competing in Europe it took me about a week or so to start feeling back to my normal self. However, I was surprised when Andrew Carlson and I did a short shakeout (through the streets full of college-aged protesters) upon arriving and my legs had some spring in them. I wasn't sure if it was because they were well-rested from all the sitting or if I had some extra-adrenaline running through the streets of unrest late on Friday night wearing USA gear. I was not quite sure what the rebellion was all about but I later learned that it had nothing to do with the United States. Needless to say I was happy to get back to the athletes village, grab a quick bite to eat, and get some shut-eye.

The next day was pre-race. I was starting to feel a little bit of pre-race nerves. Not because I was nervous about how I would do, but because I was nervous that I wouldn't run a smart race. I knew, especially after seeing the flat race course, that many of the athletes would go out very hard once the gun went off. I typically have a tendency to challenge myself early on, but I knew that due to my relative inexperience (this would be just my second 20K) if I went out too hard I would pay the price later on. A lot of learning to race longer distances involves me learning where my edges are in terms of pace. It can be difficult to know just how hard I can push my self when racing unfamiliar distances. However, based on my training my coach and I knew that I could handle about 2:55 per 1000 meters. So my strategy was to go out at this pace and try and run as many people down at the end. I hadn't thought much about the American record going into the race because I knew that Khalid Khannouchi had run somewhere around 57:30ish when he set the world record in New Haven. What I didn't know was that he wasn't an American citizen at the time so the actual record was somewhere in the neighborhood of 58:40ish set by my good friend, the extremely talented Abdi Abdirahman. He had run that time on a much more challenging course during a solo effort so I knew that with the international competition and the flat and fast course I had a shot at it. The circuit was great for me because it was flat and it consisted of four 5K loops. I like loop courses because they help me to break a race down into even segments do that I always know where I was am while running.

When the gun went off, all of us Americans basically walked across the starting line after getting pushed to the back by our fellow competitors. The Africans shot out the first 400. I remember looking up just before the first 1K and seeing a huge pack of runners well in front of me. There first1K had to be under 2:40 because Andrew Carlson and I were 2:53 and no where near the front. It was great to have Andrew to work with for the first 5K loop. Having a fellow American around makes a world of difference. At the first 5K I was still way back in 14:33. I later learned that the leaders had come through in 14:05 and then run a blazing 13:47 or so for their next 5K loop. I was glad that I was able to feel my edges and run a smart race. I was pleased to see my 5K split as I felt very comfortable. I decided to increase my tempo a bit for the next 5K loop and try and move up. For the remainder of the race I was constantly moving up, which had its own challenge because I could never tuck in with groups that I was catching because their tempo was now slower than my own and I knew I had to keep moving forward if I was going to place high. I was excited to see my 10k split right on 29 minutes. I began to think that I could possibly break 58 minutes and finish high. Everyone was beginning to come back fast now.

In hindsight I only wish that the race were longer. I remember the race going by fast and the pace feeling very comfortable as I set my sight on a top 10 finish. I could begin to see up to about fifth place or so but fatigue began to set in with about 2K to go and I knew that I had left just a little too much ground to make up. When I saw the clock and saw that I would easily break 58 minutes and be the first non-African to have done so, I celebrated the good run and felt very pleased to have run a smart race and finished in a new American record time of 57:54 in my highest placing at the international level (11th). It was hard for me to not go out with the Africans (as I typically do) but I have learned that for me to really go for the win I have to run my own race-not someone else’s. I know that Americans can run with the Africans but we are going to have to be smart about it and run in the way that is best suited for us. Even though I had went out considerably slower than most of the field I was able to run an even race running the third fastest last 10K of anybody in the field and the second fastest last 5K. Now it is just a matter of a lot more hard training to steadily improve my endurance.

The highlight of the trip was getting to better know my teammates and coaches. We were blessed to have Mark Plaatjes as the US men's coach. He gave us great advice and was a fun guy to hang out with. Later I watched his World Championship marathon win and was truly inspired. All of the men and women on the team were great to be around. The trip was quite an experience. It is one that I was truly grateful to be a part of and will remember for years to come.

December 8, 2006
Reflection of the ING New York City Marathon 2006
(Posted December 20, 2006)

When I was first beginning to run, my Dad told me "inspiration comes before perspiration. " I am sure that plenty of people have heard this saying before, but it made a real impact on me as I started my running career. I always try and think about why I run. At times it is easy to lose sight of what motivates me to run, or worse yet, it is easy to start running for all the wrong reasons. I find that it is hard at times to run for the same reasons that I set out to run for. I think this is a typical problem for all people in all professions, particularly when someone experiences instant success. But every once in a while something happens to catch our attention and bring us back to our true motivations. I recently had one such experience that brought me back to my eighth grade year, stretching on my front porch with my Dad just before we set out on my first run (a 15 mile jog around the local lake), when he told me that "inspiration comes before perspiration. "

This past November I had the pleasure of taking part (in all ways except the actual race) in the ING NYC Marathon weekend. It was an experience that has inspired me and brought me back to my passion for running. Being apart of the ING New York City Marathon was an eye opening experience to say the least. I had no idea how big of a production the NYC Marathon is. It was what I pictured the Olympics being like. There was a contagious running enthusiasm buzzing in New York that I have never experienced before. Everything from the gigantic expo packed with runners, to the pre-race pasta dinner, to riding up the elevator watching a visual tour of the course far exceeded my expectations of what a major marathon is like.

However, what really blew my mind was seeing how many spectators lined the course. I had just come from the IAAF World Road Running Championships, which I thought had a decent amount of spectators for a 20K course, but the ING New York City Marathon had exponentially more spectators every step of the way. I could not imagine running the actual race getting cheered on, as loud as it was out there, the entire way. I don't know how those guys hold back the first half of the race. I was surprised to see the city’s incredible support of the race. Everyone gets so into it. Elite runners are treated like how I imagine a professional basketball or football player would be. Everyone from the NYPD to the thousands of volunteers who lined the course were all not only there doing their job, but genuinely excited to be there. Anyone who has ever seen the ING New York City Marathon would be inspired in some way. If not from the elites smoothly clicking off mile after mile at sub-5-minute-per-mile pace, then they could find inspiration from any of the other 38,000 people competing.

I have always dreamed of running in the Olympic games ever since I first watched the games on television. In November 2007, the road to the Olympics will go through New York as the New York Road Runners and the city of New York host the Olympic marathon trials. After taking part in the ING New York City Marathon this year I know that the Olympic marathon trials will be the most exciting race of my life thus far and I want to be ready for it. Ever since I got back from New York and began training for 2007 I have seen myself racing in Central Park against the country’s best marathoners in just under a year. With this inspiration I find it easy to dedicate myself to the hard training necessary for the opportunity to compete and see my dreams come true.

Summer 2006 Entry (Posted September 20, 2006)

Big Plans

In the good old book, it says "though a man plans his ways, the Lord directs his steps. " I had big plans for the summer of 2006. It would be my second summer spent in Europe competing against the world’s best. My previous summer in Europe was unplanned and uncharted territory. My results were disappointing, culminating in a valiant dying effort in my 5K heat at the 2005 World Track and Field Championships; however, I chalked it all up to a learning experience resulting from running the long collegiate season. I told myself that next summer would be different. Working with Team Running USA, from the early fall of 2005, we had carefully plotted how we would peak for the European season having my best performances in races in which I would be able to tuck in behind a slew of faster runners, hopefully being pulled along to personal best times at the 1500, 5000, and possibly even debuting in the 10,000. All season I was hungry to redeem my past European racing experience. Naturally, I was also excited to see new parts of the world, especially considering I would be able to travel with my new wife, Sara, taking in the sights together. It would be only my second trip to Europe and we were planning races in Belgium, the UK, Switzerland and Italy. However, as hungry and excited as I was to set new personal bests and see new sites, I was about to be taught an important life lesson.

Arriving in Belgium it seemed as if everything was going to go according to plan. We stayed our first few nights at a training center outside of Brussels, preparing to race a low key 1500. The first few days were spent recuperating from the long trip and seeing some of the nearby cities. Belgium would be our new home for the next two months. For my wife Sara and I it would be the second longest amount of time we had spent in any one place since we had been married, so it really would be like home for us. Lueven, Belgium did not disappoint us as a wonderful summer home. The people were friendly; the food was great; the countryside was beautiful; there were perfect trails for running, and my personal favorite was the amazing bakeries on every corner. The scene was set for the perfect summer.

I was coming off a sub-par 5000 at the USA champs after making a tactical mistake of going out too hard, too early. I paid the price not only for the last four laps but also for the rest of the summer. I steadily lost momentum and confidence over the remainder of the season. Of course, a nasty cold didn't help things. I found myself in a downward spiral that I could not pull myself out of. By the end of the first month in Europe both Sara and I were wishing we could continue to travel around Europe, however our racing was going poorly.

My last race in Europe was one that I will always remember. I was racing at the Crystal Palace in London against the world record holder for 5000 meters and a slew of talented Americans. I remember watching the sun setting as we did our final strides before our race, in front of a packed and energetic crowd and thinking to myself that even though things had not really gone how I had hoped that I had begun to learn to enjoy life despite the sometimes difficult circumstances I found myself in. I know that this lesson will be one that I continue to learn over the remainder of my running years and one that I am excited that I began to grasp this summer. There are a lot of things in life we can control but there are some things that we can't; at the end of the day I know that I want to live with passion and joy no matter what the outcome.

Introductory Entry

One of the things that I most enjoy about running is getting to see new parts of the world. This past fall and winter I was blessed to take two trips to Japan, two trips to Boston, a trip to New York and a trip to Puerto Rico. Each trip was a unique learning experience, however my trip to Puerto Rico topped them all.

I had just come off the high of winning my first National US XC title in New York when I got on the plane to run the Worlds Best 10k in Puerto Rico. I knew very little about the competition. All I knew is that there would be a lot of African runners chasing the big prize money being offered. To say the least, I was naive about what was ahead.

I had only run one other road race previously and had never run a 10k on the roads so everything was new to me. I realized how completely different racing in Puerto Rico would be in contrast to New York when I stepped off the plane on a winter day and it was a humid 80 degrees. I took a cab to our beautiful beach side resort. That was the beginning of luxurious weekend. I did all my runs on a path running right alongside the water and spent my meals trying to get to know my Kenyan competitors. I had never heard of John Korir (previously ranked the number one world road racer in the world) or any of the other incredible runners that I would face on a breezy, hot and humid Sunday afternoon.

I began to get nervous when I heard the competitors discussing how fast they wanted to go out for the first 3k and when I heard the stories of how past years had gone. The race director was offering 100,000 for a world record so the race notoriously goes out at world record pace. I wasn't even sure I was capable of running a 3k at world record pace. However, I found out that I was.

Race day came and I approached the line trying to forget that I would be the only non-African in the lead pack. I tried to push the negative thoughts to the back of my mind. When you have been told over and over again how genetically superior the Africans are and how Americans don't have the slightest chance in competing with them it is hard to keep believing that maybe you can break the trend.